the heart of prayer

as human beings, we are wired in such a way where in everything we do, we want to see results. we want to know that the time and effort we put into any task will make a difference, something that would not be there had we not participated.

unfortunately, we bring with us the same mindset into prayer. we enter into prayer knowing that prayer is effective and knowing an infinite God hears and answers our prayer. had we not known that we would not pray at all!

so we pray. and we expect our prayers to make a difference, specifically visible, tangible signs. so we begin looking for signs and any evidence of change, any sign that our hours spent talking to an unseen God made any difference. we look around our campus, which, at a glance, appears to be just about the same, and we lose hope. we give up. we get angry and upset at God, frustrated, tired, weary, and we lose hope. we question our decision of being obedient to God, our ability to judge and discern and follow the leadership of His voice in the first place, and if we are even on the right track. suddenly we feel powerless, and incapable of changing anything. unfortunately, that is true. we can't change anything when we forget about who He is and we realize we have forgotten that it is not by what we can do, not by our power our might, but by His Spirit alone that changes.

it's times like these where we learn the heart of prayer itself. intercession. prayer not to see physical, tangible, immediate results. but knowing the season of prayer we find ourselves in. yes. a season of sowing. and honestly, it isn't the most glorious season, where we see the fruit, the splendor and glory. but we find ourselves riding on a wave. a wave of the spirit of prayer that has been stirring on this campus for years past. a wave that has only gotten bigger and is still growing even now. we find ourselves swept into the movement of sowing to see kingdom come at UCSD not knowing when fruit will be ready, let alone what they even look like.

yet we sow. we sow because we love to be in His presence. because we yearn for the things on His heart. we sow not for the sake of immediate, tangible results, but to respond and engage in a movement of a wave of His Spirit that has touched our lives. we sow in confidence, knowing that in His timing, He is faithful to the end, to finish what He started (phil. 1:6)